You need to look much more deeply within if you are going to understand what motivates your more than occasional tendency to be pessimistic or depressed about your current or desired relationship. Can I give you more answer than that?

If you require more, than I would say you need to see if there is a part of you that still nurses a grudge from a past injury. I know, I know, it is impossible to injure you, but perhaps you can try the experiment of stopping teling yourself that and actualy *looking*. For the most part, your forward-looking self is getting on with your life pretty well, but my opinion is that part of you may be holding back, still nursing old wounds from painful abuses of trust. It's time to let those wounds heal. There may be scars, but you don't have to let old wounds impact your current relationship in ways that are uncomfortable for everybody.

In a nutshell? Stop. Projecting.

Healing always begins by scrutinizing your current motives and attitude. Are you exercising the forgiving part of your nature? Who's winning on the inside -- your optimistic and trusting impulses, or fear and resentment? I understand that such a pessimistic tendency is sometimes learned through experience and can feel like the truth but now is the time time to reprogram your beliefs so that things can work out.

Leave old negative feelings in the past where they belong, my dear.